Sexual bondage has been a common thread throughout my life. I never knew why I struggled and often brushed it off as something that would always be apart of my life. As any addiction goes it is progressive and starts to affect other parts of your life. I continued to pray for deliverance with no success. The constant failure left me hopeless and alone. The shame I felt was debilitating, fearing nobody could accept me for who I really was, the good and bad.
Being married was another element to my shame and guilt. I feared if my wife ever found out or knew she would not accept me and possibly leave.
Sitting in my car crying alone at my lowest with no hope, I concluded that any consequence was worth the hope of healing. I knew that I could not do this on my own, and that’s when I started searching for counselors. I truly believe God intervened and Brian’s page came up on my search. I vividly remember him answering the phone. We spoke briefly and set our first appointment.
Sharing my story with Brian was the hardest and best decision I have ever made. This was the beginning of a process I could never have fathomed. Brian listened to my story with so much grace and care, and together we walked through my story discovering the roots of my pain. Throughout our counseling I had more growth and understanding that I could have ever imagined.
After disclosure to my wife we both began counseling with Brian. Bringing my wife in on my pain and betrayal was heartbreaking and devastating. Being counseled as a couple was pivotal to walking through the pain I brought into our marriage. My gracious wife stuck by my side and together we walked through the hardest season of our lives. We discovered a depth of intimacy and a new understanding of each other’s story. We were so blessed to have this facilitated and guided through counseling.
I am so thankful for the growth and healing I experienced. If you are lost in sexual bondage I encourage to reach out for help. It was the best decision I could have made. Do not do this alone!